What Women Want
So we’ve established that women aren’t being written very well. But is this a social problem, or is there hope for the future? I was sincerely concerned, but then I came upon a miraculous little gem of a show…
So B-Gata H-Kei (“I Dunno Lol”) is a show with a simple premise.
More likely than getting into a college, I will say that.
It claims to be a show about a slut. Oh, but it’s also horribly, horribly lying. Of course, you’d be forgiven if you didn’t get that impression from watching.
But it’s totally not about what a gigantic slut Yamada is. Because that is a lie. After all, what kind of idiots would sponsor a show about some huge slut?
These idiots.
Fortunately for them, it isn’t.
“Aha,” you say. “So this is just that whole ‘it’s actually a romance and the whole slut premise is disingenuous, an attempt to convince us to watch a show under false pretenses!’” And if you said that you’d be a goddamn idiot, because this show is a brilliant study in unreliable narrators.
What Men Want
If you were the sort of moron who thought this show was about the happy romance of a generic dude and a girl who thinks she’s a slut but really isn’t, you’d probably buy the shit sandwich premise B-Gata H-Kei is feeding you that these two can’t possibly just fuck. Except that’s completely impossible, because men don’t work that way.
The first clear hint that something is under the surface of this show.
How romantic.
Dudes don’t care why a woman wants to fuck them. In fact, they only think about one thing.
It’s not complicated. Therefore the issue is not with… whatever his name is. The issue must be with Yamada.
What Women REALLY Want
Since everything is clearly her fault, we have to look through the superficial narrative to determine Yamada’s true objective. Sex is no obstacle if she actually wants to attain it. So let’s look at subtext.
The storyline would have you believe that her rampant sluttery is kept in check by a crippling sex anxiety.
I didn't know Larry David was writing anime.
Consequently we’re led to believe that she’s not REALLY a slut because she can’t actually go through with it. But wait a second…
So on the one hand she hates being embarassed by her own freakiness...
...yet puts herself in awkward situations...
...and fantasizes about the humiliation...
...and then orgasms a little afterward.
I know exactly what she wants.
This is all that she wants.
Yamada is just an emotional masochist who gets off on abusing other people’s good natures to embarass herself so she can have mindblowing masturbation sessions. She doesn’t even give a shit about… whatever that guy’s name is. She just wants to hurt herself so she can fuck herself later. She doesn’t want 100 fuckbuddies, she just wants to imagine herself as depraved enough to have them and perverse enough to imagine that everyone condemns her for it. Then she touches herself. It’s so obvious you’d have to be retarded not to notice. Which is probably why you did.
So what does she need the guy for?
And you almost got away with it, you clever bitch.
So What Have We Learned?
That Yamada is the most realistic female character ever.
Stick around for part 3, in which we examine theological insights from the feminine perspective in Angel Beats.
May 2, 2010 at 4:14 am
[...] 1. I mean, Joshikousei was funnier, and a more articulate social critique… I might keep reading analyses of it as they pop out, though. They're a lot more entertaining than the show [...]